Guiding God's Marriage: Faith and Social Change in Premarital Counseling

Guiding God's Marriage examines how religious leaders use premarital counseling to influence how we view intimacy, highlighting the tension between individualism and community in people's relational lives. It offers a rare view of visions about how to realize a successful and faith-filled relationship.

Format: Paperback / softback
Length: 272 pages
Publication date: 29 April 2024
Publisher: New York University Press

Premarital counseling has become an increasingly important aspect of the modern marriage process, with religious leaders playing a significant role in shaping how we view intimacy. Guiding God's Marriage: An Examination of Christian Marriage Preparation Programs explores the efforts of Christian marriage preparation programs to stabilize the institution of marriage and highlights the tension between individualism and community in people's relational lives. The book documents the changes in content and practices of Christian premarital education and offers advice on what makes a good marriage. Archival research and firsthand observations of four marriage preparation courses, as well as seventy interviews with participating couples and leaders, provide a rare view of visions about how to realize a successful and faith-filled relationship. This examination of marriage classes offers key insight into how religious communities have responded to cultural changes in marriage, gender, sexuality, and intimacy.

One of the key findings of Guiding God's Marriage is that Christian marriage preparation programs have become increasingly individualistic in their approach to marriage. While traditional marriage preparation programs emphasized the importance of community and the role of the church in shaping relationships, modern programs often focus on the individual's needs and desires. This individualistic approach can be seen in the emphasis on premarital counseling, which is often seen as a way to help couples prepare for marriage and address any potential issues before they become serious problems.

However, the individualistic approach to marriage preparation can also have negative consequences. For example, it can lead to a sense of isolation and loneliness for couples who are not part of a religious community. It can also create a sense of pressure to conform to societal norms and expectations, which can be harmful to the relationship.

To address these negative consequences, Guiding God's Marriage suggests that religious communities should take a more holistic approach to marriage preparation. This approach should include a focus on the community and the role of the church in shaping relationships, as well as a focus on the individual's needs and desires.

One way that religious communities can take a more holistic approach to marriage preparation is by offering premarital counseling that is more inclusive and diverse. This counseling should be designed to meet the needs of couples from different backgrounds and cultures, and should include a range of topics, such as communication, conflict resolution, and sexuality.

Another way that religious communities can take a more holistic approach to marriage preparation is by providing support for couples after they have married. This support can include regular meetings with a pastor or counselor, as well as opportunities for couples to participate in community activities and events.

However, it is important to note that implementing a more holistic approach to marriage preparation can be challenging. Many religious communities are resistant to change, and may be reluctant to embrace new approaches to marriage preparation. This resistance can be overcome by providing education and training to religious leaders and by creating a culture of support and acceptance within the community.

In addition to the individualistic approach to marriage preparation, Guiding God's Marriage also highlights the tension between individualism and community in people's relational lives. This tension can be seen in the way that couples balance their own needs and desires with the needs and desires of their family and community.

For example, some couples may prioritize their own careers and financial success over their relationship, while others may prioritize their relationship over their careers and financial success. This tension can be difficult to navigate, and can lead to conflict and resentment.

To address this tension, Guiding God's Marriage suggests that couples should work together to develop a shared vision for their relationship. This vision should include a commitment to each other's needs and desires, as well as a commitment to the community and the church.

In conclusion, Guiding God's Marriage: An Examination of Christian Marriage Preparation Programs offers a valuable insight into how religious communities have responded to cultural changes in marriage, gender, sexuality, and intimacy. The book highlights the tension between individualism and community in people's relational lives and suggests that religious communities should take a more holistic approach to marriage preparation to address these negative consequences. By offering premarital counseling that is more inclusive and diverse, providing support for couples after they have married, and creating a culture of support and acceptance within the community, religious communities can help couples form and maintain their relationships.

Weight: 418g
Dimension: 152 x 229 x 18 (mm)
ISBN-13: 9781479822157